*The following is a guest post by Laura Kennedy who was inspired to write in response to yesterday’s post called The Problem with Halloween.
I’ve heard it so many times before…adults dressing up on Halloween are “taking it away from the kids.” Only certain costumes are “appropriate.” The children are eating candy! Buying costumes is “wasteful.” And my personal favorite: “I’m not crafty so making costumes is out of the question.” (Usually said with pursed lips and special disdain for the word “crafty.”)
Yes, the merchants beat it to death by starting in August. Too, too, true! And yet they do the same thing for the rest of the holidays. Why does Halloween seem to come in for more than its share of Mrs. Grundyism? (Grumble grumble somebody somewhere is having fun. Inappropriately.)
Halloween makes a lot of people nervous. It happens at the spookiest time of the year, when the dark comes earlier each day, when some parts of the country are having horrible storms, or earthquakes, or we are just feeling more susceptible to general heebie-jeebies. And rather than acknowledging their primal, ancient fears, some folks just prune up and disapprove. Which is a pity, because Halloween’s spirit of mild mayhem is a great antidote to those fears!
But this remedy requires that we first face up to our fears and then counter them with our creativity.
I agree about the wastefulness of packaged costumes! But to say you can’t come up with anything else because you’re not “crafty” is a poor excuse. Perhaps the idea of creating something scares you as much as the ghouls and goblins floating around in the autumn mists? Or even more? What if you put effort into it and another Mrs. Grundy disapproves? Horrors!
Don’t like trick or treating? Throw a party for the neighborhood kids! Bobbing for apples, hanging donuts from strings for a no-hands eating contest, a costume parade, use your imagination! Commercial candy is garbage? Make popcorn balls, caramel apples, homemade donuts! (Besides, a little candy once a year never hurt a normal kid, no matter how crappy it is. They don’t have to eat it all, Mom—you can work that one out.)
Only certain costumes are appropriate? Who says? Masquerade, of all sorts, is a time-honored tradition in scary times. Besides, it’s fun. Get into the spirit. Adults shouldn’t wear costumes? Why ever not? My kids enjoyed it even more when the adults joined in. C’mon, loosen up. Grab a witch hat, or a bed sheet, or even a feather boa, and put on another personality for the evening.
Creativity is edgy—which is part of the fun. It needn’t be overwhelmingly scary, as long as you don’t surrender to the Mrs. Grundys of the world. She has a lot of faces. Your disapproving mother? Neighbor? Ignore them! The one who really shortchanges you is the Mrs. Grundy who lives inside you.
Go ahead. Goose her. Maybe even she can learn to lighten up and have a little mischievous fun.
- Laura
Laura Kennedy is a native Californian whose heart has been in England since childhood, largely owing to an early overindulgence in British children’s literature.
{ 7 comments… read them below or add one }
Here here! Well said. As a native New Englander, Halloween was always my favorite holiday of the year. There is something empowering about running around in the dark dressed up in a costume for a kid. It makes it less scary and more fun! Plus, there was always warm apple cider at my family’s house afterwords for all the neighborhood kids. And as an adult, I love handing out the candy to the trick or treaters and seeing that same excitement in their eyes that I once had.
(Nowadays there is trick or treating in daylight hours for safety. I always feel bad for those kids. It’s all about the dark.)
In some of the ‘burbs here there are designated Treick or Treating hourse, which I always find somewhat controlling.
And last year we had a tot who was allowed to come to the door and trick or treat but his parents wouldn’t let him take any candy. Needless to say he wasn’t very happy. I mean, what’s the point in that?
Well said. There’s a lot of point to this holiday that gets buried. Sometimes the best way to greet winter’s darkness is with your held high, and wearing fancy dress. Fear makes some uncomfortable, but it is good and healthy to giggle & laugh about it a little or to scare yourself watching horror movies.
I like the oncoming winter dark. Maybe it’s in my Scottish-English ancestral bones to embrace it.
Very well said, Laura! Im a native Californian that has become fascinated with dia de los muertos traditions as well, something I never even knew about growing up! I love to create vignettes of vintage Halloween objects, decorate with autumn leaves and pumpkins and light candles this time of year, it speaks to my soul in a very comforting way!
Thank you, Laura! You said everything I wanted to say yesterday but was too ticked to put it the nice way you did. I love Halloween and all of the hoopla makes people smile – something we all need these days – and I think that’s why we Americans love gearing up for this holiday. It’s just plain FUN. Have a wonderful Halloween to everyone and please be careful out there!
Brief pause.. followed by thunderous applause
I think Dia de los Muertos is a great Halloween “chaser” and makes the very few things I don’t like about Halloween more palatable.
Thanks for writing this Laura, I do appreciate a blog that is willing to be a place where everyone’s opinions can be voiced and respected. I hope you and your family have a wonderful Halloween!
Cheers, Mrs Grundy